Random Muse #2

Waiting is not my favorite thing to do. most people who know me know this. But lately im finding that waiting is all that i can do. I mean, I know that i cannot function without the Spirit, and i try not to walk outside of His promptings, but He likes giving me things that i can't do ANYTHING with on my own. It's like, "Here zach, feel this. I'm not going to tell you why right now, but there is a reason." and i'm like "uh...okay" its not like i can truly say no. But what to do when you're discerning things for the first time; what to do when you're feeling something with almost complete understanding of everything about it ASIDE from what to do with it? The only thing left to do is wait, and ask God what He's doing. I don't know why found it surprising that the main reason i had no idea what was going on was because i never asked Him. I feel like i relearn old lessons again, cause something small just slips out in the midst of the chaos and the Lord wants to remind me. Sometimes it feels like the only way i'll get to understand these things is if i run and jump out there and make mistakes, which i would rather not have to make (once again, those of you who know me know this). but there's also a strange peace that comes with waiting on Him. a peace that's like "I know what You've shown me, and went where You sent me, and did what You told me to do. I got nothing else." It's liberating when the standard is lowered from being superman to being someone who simply does what is commanded of him. am i making sense here? i know I'm kinda rambling, but this is a blog, so deal with it.